Funny Quotes 1

Searching for Funny Quotes then, stop searching because you are already here, you are now in the right place. Check out these Funny Quotes coming from different sources.

  • “I recorded my hair this morning, tonight I'm watching the highlights.”
    by Jay London
  • “Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.”
    by Bill Cosby
  • “I haven't spoken to my wife in years. I didn't want to interrupt her.”
    by Rodney Dangerfield
  • “A man doesn't know what he knows until he knows what he doesn't know.”
    by Laurence J. Peter
  • “I distrust camels, and anyone else who can go a week without a drink.”
    by Joe E. Lewis
  • “For sheer sexiness, a man must be beautiful. Funny. yes. Clever, no.”
    by Jilly Cooper
  • “I like funny guys and those, for some reason, tend to be nerdy guys.”
    by Megan Fox
  • “It's always funny until someone gets hurt. Then it's just hilarious.”
    by Bill Hicks
  • “Television has brought back murder into the home - where it belongs.”
    by Alfred Hitchcock
  • “Before I refuse to take your questions, I have an opening statement.”
    by Ronald Reagan
  • “A pessimist is a person who has had to listen to too many optimists.”
    by Don Marquis
  • “I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.”
    by Will Rogers
  • “All right everyone, line up alphabetically according to your height.”
    by Casey Stengel
  • “A lot of people are afraid of heights. Not me, I'm afraid of widths.”
    by Steven Wright
  • “I don't think my judgment is that good. I don't know what is funny.”
    by Jerry Stiller
  • “It's the cushiest job, but some lines are so funny that I crack up.”
    by Dan Castellaneta
  • “Life was a funny thing that happened to me on the way to the grave.”
    by Quentin Crisp
  • “I think it's funny to be delicate with subjects that are explosive.”
    by Jerry Seinfeld
  • “From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.”
    by Dr. Seuss
  • “If at first you don't succeed, find out if the loser gets anything.”
    by William Lyon Phelps

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One comment on “Funny Quotes

  1. Reply goldie Mar 27, 2013 01:22

    This was one of the best quote sites I’ve ever seen.

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